The New Year is off and going whether I'm ready or not. It's finally hit me, I'm going to be gone for 6 months. It's weird to not have to think about buying books and figuring where my classes would be for the next semester. Instead I'm raising money, getting vaccines, and trying to prepare my heart for what God has in store for me. I was warned that before I left I would experience a wide range of emotions regarding training and outreach. Whoever told me that was 100% correct. Many of the emotions have been ones that test my faith and often make me second guess myself. I often think this is the way God is preparing me for the next step in my life.
Ever since I was accepted into the YES program I have be amazed that I'm actually going to go overseas and help. I have always thought the idea of "missions" was good, but didn't see myself ever pursuing anything like it. It took me awhile in life to realize that God's plan is the only plan a person can be guided through. I thought through the majority of my life that I could control my life the way I wanted it go. Once I realized my thinking was wrong, all of my ideas about myself ended up going the opposite way. For example, the idea of a person having depression. I thought depression was something that a person could control and that when they felt down they just needed to suck it up and snap out of it. Boy was I wrong, because this idea in turn was something that I would experience. See for me God was the one that I turned to praise him and thank Him for giving me such a blessed life. When I realized I had depression, I turned away from God because why would He let me have something so destructive and what did I do to deserve this? Within the last year God has turned into my rock. Though this wasn't the case for the past few years, I struggled with who was God and if there really was such a thing. I have often thought this overall ordeal that I have experienced was preparing me for the overall plan God had for me. The thought has become evident as I know for a fact if I hadn't hit rock bottom then this idea of "missions" would never have been a thought, idea or even happening in my life. Since helping others is obviously in God's plan for me it's exciting and nerve racking.
Training starts in 22 days and will go to March 19. Training for the YES program is often about finding yourself and team bonding. My team for Honduras consists of 2 guys and another girl. It has been made known to me that a team leader(s) may come from an outside person and would come later to training. However, if they feel that a leader is better suited within the four of us then they will pick a leader from our group. While in Honduras our team will work with our contact person Matthew Keiser check out his blog here: http://honduraskeiser.blogspot.com. The only thing I know what we will be doing at this point is playing with kids at a dump within La Ceiba, teaching english and setting up a vacation Bible school. All the details have not been given quite yet, but I will be sure to keep everyone updated via emails and here too.
For now, I will leave you. Please pray for me as I continue to prepare for training. Thank you for everyone's support through everything, I really support it and I'm truly grateful for having such an amazing support system!